and She Said (![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} bloodied_quill) wrote,@ 2006-02-28 23:12:00 |
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Title: Ours
Category: fan fiction, one-shot
Genre: reflective
Rating: PG
Date: February 2006
Written for![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/community.gif)
30_kisses
Theme: 4 - our distance and that person
Pairing: hyde and Megumi (L'Arc~en~Ciel)
Disclaimer: I do not own/am not affiliated with L’Arc~en~Ciel, Sony Ki/oon, Danger Crue, hyde, Megumi, etc. This is a work of complete fiction. It’s for fun; I’m not going to make any money off of this. However, this particular story is my own writing, so please do not claim it as yours or repost it without permission.
Word Count: 550
POV: First person (hyde)
Summary: A child changes everything. Of course, we know what there is to be said for change.
She never looked quite so beautiful as when I saw her holding our newborn son for the first time.
It didn’t matter that she looked so tired and worn out, that she even touched her hair with embarrassment and blushed, saying she knew she looked as though she hadn’t slept in a year.
Neither of us could do much more than beam.
She is beautiful. In every way.
Of course, there is more than one kind of beautiful.
The beauty of her strength—that was never a problem. It was, at the risk of repeating myself—beautiful. And I loved it.
And of course, the infant fussing in her arms—he was beautiful, and I loved him.
And that, of course, was not a problem.
It was another kind of beauty that became an issue.
When he cried all night—Megumi was beautiful, and I loved her. And I stared at the ceiling almost wanting to join the chorus out of pure frustration. Not for the lost sleep, because I’d gladly have gone the night without it…if only for something else.
When she shooed me out of the bathroom and gave me that look,—oh, god, she looked half amused and half disgusted and even that was...beautiful.
Now that I’ve made myself sound like a lustful dog…
It wasn’t just about that at all.
And I’m not trying to blame anyone here.
I suppose I could take quite a lot of blame here—going away for tours, long hours at the studio, trying not to completely lose track of my friends.
I was never blind to the resentment that caused, trust me.
And I’d be in denial if I claimed not to resent my own son.
As horrible as that is.
You know how children are very egocentric? They seem to believe that the whole world revolves around them, and that whatever they think is how it is.
They’ve pretty much got that one right on the dot.
Because, whether I felt displaced by him or not, all he had to do to be at the center of my world was simply exist.
And it was the same way for her.
It just sometimes seemed like her world didn’t have room for anything else.
I swear—if our anniversary weren’t on Christmas, she’d have forgotten it.
And she didn’t seem to realize it was my birthday until 4 that afternoon.
I got up and made her breakfast in bed on hers.
And she was surprised.
Not only that I’d done it, but that it was her birthday.
Apparently, her world didn’t even have enough room for her.
And I wondered more than a few times just how far it could go.
When the line would be crossed where husband and wife were nothing more than formal titles that we held on to so that our son would have the structure of both mother and father.
Because that does happen, no matter how much every couple likes to think it won’t be them.
But we’re held together by the same thing that pushes us apart.
He’s not hers or mine, but ours.
Our distance, and our connection, rest in something, someone, who may never understand his power.
And as I kiss him goodnight and smile, I can’t hold that against him.
please comment if you read
Requests are open here.
Category: fan fiction, one-shot
Genre: reflective
Rating: PG
Date: February 2006
Written for
30_kissesTheme: 4 - our distance and that person
Pairing: hyde and Megumi (L'Arc~en~Ciel)
Disclaimer: I do not own/am not affiliated with L’Arc~en~Ciel, Sony Ki/oon, Danger Crue, hyde, Megumi, etc. This is a work of complete fiction. It’s for fun; I’m not going to make any money off of this. However, this particular story is my own writing, so please do not claim it as yours or repost it without permission.
Word Count: 550
POV: First person (hyde)
Summary: A child changes everything. Of course, we know what there is to be said for change.
She never looked quite so beautiful as when I saw her holding our newborn son for the first time.
It didn’t matter that she looked so tired and worn out, that she even touched her hair with embarrassment and blushed, saying she knew she looked as though she hadn’t slept in a year.
Neither of us could do much more than beam.
She is beautiful. In every way.
Of course, there is more than one kind of beautiful.
The beauty of her strength—that was never a problem. It was, at the risk of repeating myself—beautiful. And I loved it.
And of course, the infant fussing in her arms—he was beautiful, and I loved him.
And that, of course, was not a problem.
It was another kind of beauty that became an issue.
When he cried all night—Megumi was beautiful, and I loved her. And I stared at the ceiling almost wanting to join the chorus out of pure frustration. Not for the lost sleep, because I’d gladly have gone the night without it…if only for something else.
When she shooed me out of the bathroom and gave me that look,—oh, god, she looked half amused and half disgusted and even that was...beautiful.
Now that I’ve made myself sound like a lustful dog…
It wasn’t just about that at all.
And I’m not trying to blame anyone here.
I suppose I could take quite a lot of blame here—going away for tours, long hours at the studio, trying not to completely lose track of my friends.
I was never blind to the resentment that caused, trust me.
And I’d be in denial if I claimed not to resent my own son.
As horrible as that is.
You know how children are very egocentric? They seem to believe that the whole world revolves around them, and that whatever they think is how it is.
They’ve pretty much got that one right on the dot.
Because, whether I felt displaced by him or not, all he had to do to be at the center of my world was simply exist.
And it was the same way for her.
It just sometimes seemed like her world didn’t have room for anything else.
I swear—if our anniversary weren’t on Christmas, she’d have forgotten it.
And she didn’t seem to realize it was my birthday until 4 that afternoon.
I got up and made her breakfast in bed on hers.
And she was surprised.
Not only that I’d done it, but that it was her birthday.
Apparently, her world didn’t even have enough room for her.
And I wondered more than a few times just how far it could go.
When the line would be crossed where husband and wife were nothing more than formal titles that we held on to so that our son would have the structure of both mother and father.
Because that does happen, no matter how much every couple likes to think it won’t be them.
But we’re held together by the same thing that pushes us apart.
He’s not hers or mine, but ours.
Our distance, and our connection, rest in something, someone, who may never understand his power.
And as I kiss him goodnight and smile, I can’t hold that against him.
please comment if you read
Requests are open here.
